Written on 23 Mar : 21:09
Now Playing: Everyone I love
is dead - Type O Negative
Nicolas awakens, the world
seems surreal, and he feels somehow different. He can remember the
ceremony….well, less than a ceremony really; he remembers the events of the
evening. How long ago it was, he cannot remember. It is nighttime when he
rises, he knew immediately upon consciousness that he was not alone in the
room; he could feel the presence of the others. In fact he feels as if he could
sense their presence prior to his awakening. Not knowing their identities, he
does somehow register familiarity with one of the heartbeats that he is
discerning, feels connected to its rhythm, like he has been near it before. As
he rises he notices that he feels “stronger” maybe that is not the right choice
of words as he actually feels a little spent as if he has no energy, possibly
it is that he feels “formidable.” He feels as if his senses are sharper than he
has ever known, he realizes that he can actually see in the darkness, even
though there is no light penetrating into the room.
As he turns towards the comfort of the familiar rhythm, he becomes aware of a burning; a craving; a hunger. He feels as if he hasn’t eaten in weeks, famished. As he approaches the pulse of the familiar rhythm, his desire to sate his hunger seems to swell, rising at an exponentially increasing rate and seems to ebb and flow with the pulse of the heartbeat he can radiating throughout the room and reverberating throughout his body.
Approaching a chair in the corner of the room he can make out the sleeping figure of the one who had borne him, the ghoul of many years past. His natural mother who had become little more than a phantasm he would see out of his periphery, sat asleep in the chair. The “need” was rising within him and building to a crescendo, a peak he felt he would be unable to stop himself from falling from. The swell could almost be seen pulsing within his being, screaming for him to satiate his hunger, yet he knew that mere food was not the answer; the beating pulse of the heartbeats in the room was more mesmerizing as any trance he could imagine. As he began to grapple with his situation, as his reason began to gain foothold within his chaos, he understood. The events of the evening(s) prior had taken place, it was not some dream state that he had fallen into, and there had been a ceremony. Although not a ceremony in the literal sense, as there had been little pomp and no circumstance, a transformation had taken place, an Embrace had occurred. He suddenly realized that he far more than felt different, he was now different, he was no longer a mortal, he was vampire.
Still sleeping, the steady rhythmic beating of his mother’s heart held him almost in a fugue state a kind of waking coma. As captivated as he was, he could still discern the approach of the other heartbeat from across the room. It was approaching slowly, tentatively as if unsure of what it would find. He knew this heartbeat was, simply through association, his father. While there apparently still was some connection present between him and the one who had borne him, there was no remaining attachment for the father. The soulless ghoul who had been the source of his pain and ire for so many years, the primal cause of his position and deep down, Nicolas blamed his father for not being the father he should have been. Nicolas blamed his father for the emptiness welling inside, for the hole within his heart and soul that was filled with nothing. The lack of a father had led him to the position of lacking purpose, and lacking ability to find purpose with which to fill the void.
With reflexes lightning fast, and not a spoken word, Nicolas wheeled upon the creeping heartbeat and fixed it with his gaze. The figure stood motionless, with only sorrow filling his eyes, he was searching for release. In an instant fang separated flesh and sustenance flowed. The vampire feeds, unrelenting, without remorse, taking every last drop of sustenance from the corpse. Finally the body falls crumpled to the ground, a new creature stands fully erect, wiping his chin on his clothing, his chest full of air and with veins running full of vigor, he stares purposefully into the future that stands before him. Now with at least a sense of what he is, for once he has hope to discover what he is to do.
As he turns towards the comfort of the familiar rhythm, he becomes aware of a burning; a craving; a hunger. He feels as if he hasn’t eaten in weeks, famished. As he approaches the pulse of the familiar rhythm, his desire to sate his hunger seems to swell, rising at an exponentially increasing rate and seems to ebb and flow with the pulse of the heartbeat he can radiating throughout the room and reverberating throughout his body.
Approaching a chair in the corner of the room he can make out the sleeping figure of the one who had borne him, the ghoul of many years past. His natural mother who had become little more than a phantasm he would see out of his periphery, sat asleep in the chair. The “need” was rising within him and building to a crescendo, a peak he felt he would be unable to stop himself from falling from. The swell could almost be seen pulsing within his being, screaming for him to satiate his hunger, yet he knew that mere food was not the answer; the beating pulse of the heartbeats in the room was more mesmerizing as any trance he could imagine. As he began to grapple with his situation, as his reason began to gain foothold within his chaos, he understood. The events of the evening(s) prior had taken place, it was not some dream state that he had fallen into, and there had been a ceremony. Although not a ceremony in the literal sense, as there had been little pomp and no circumstance, a transformation had taken place, an Embrace had occurred. He suddenly realized that he far more than felt different, he was now different, he was no longer a mortal, he was vampire.
Still sleeping, the steady rhythmic beating of his mother’s heart held him almost in a fugue state a kind of waking coma. As captivated as he was, he could still discern the approach of the other heartbeat from across the room. It was approaching slowly, tentatively as if unsure of what it would find. He knew this heartbeat was, simply through association, his father. While there apparently still was some connection present between him and the one who had borne him, there was no remaining attachment for the father. The soulless ghoul who had been the source of his pain and ire for so many years, the primal cause of his position and deep down, Nicolas blamed his father for not being the father he should have been. Nicolas blamed his father for the emptiness welling inside, for the hole within his heart and soul that was filled with nothing. The lack of a father had led him to the position of lacking purpose, and lacking ability to find purpose with which to fill the void.
With reflexes lightning fast, and not a spoken word, Nicolas wheeled upon the creeping heartbeat and fixed it with his gaze. The figure stood motionless, with only sorrow filling his eyes, he was searching for release. In an instant fang separated flesh and sustenance flowed. The vampire feeds, unrelenting, without remorse, taking every last drop of sustenance from the corpse. Finally the body falls crumpled to the ground, a new creature stands fully erect, wiping his chin on his clothing, his chest full of air and with veins running full of vigor, he stares purposefully into the future that stands before him. Now with at least a sense of what he is, for once he has hope to discover what he is to do.
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